I just want to hide in this empty room. The light is too bright, so I close the curtains. The world outside is loud, but I can't hear it. My mind is quiet. Too quiet.
I slump in the chair, motionless. I don't want to study or work. I don't want to play games, either.
I don't want to move. My body feels heavy, like a stone at the bottom of a lake. I look at my phone, but I don't press any buttons. Messages come and go, but I don't care. Today, I don't want to be a part of anything.
They say this is"lazy". But I think it is just a short break. My brain needs to stop for a while. I don't need to solve any problems. I don't need to think of any ideas. I just sit here. In this empty space, I can breathe again.
看着成绩一路崩塌,这或许是迟早的必然,我像个局外人一样审视这场溃败,心里毫无波澜。我不想工作,甚至连去改变的欲望都被抽干了,只求这种 “算了” 的状态能多维持一秒。可在这极致的颓废之下,我仍然不敢,也不能,彻底放手。